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February 28

“我刚才去KR转了一圈”-- 转发高君M兄杂记,与诸位故人共怀之

 
 
我刚才去KR转了一圈
materialist   2007-11-22 22:11
 
 
我刚才去KR转了一圈,坐了一会儿。书上说:“饭后百步走,活到九十九。”我因被YIH之粥喂得饱食终日,与其在study room里面无所用心,不如实践多日的计划,去KR转一圈,坐一会,即可享延年益寿之功,又可抒解怀旧之情。一举两得,其功大也。于是就去了。

从YIH之study room,到OSA,还是二十七步,尚不计台阶十八级。从OSA到楼下,台阶四十四。楼下只有邮局还在,印度人的mama shop早在若干年之前就搬没了。此时天色尚早,因此天空中还有光亮透出来。下午的暑热尚在,若温吞之水,四周弥漫。路边之草木,绿意犹然;树上之花,残红仍存。路上苔痕印履痕,一直延伸到人迹罕至的不知何止之处。余走着,想到Alfred Houseman之<<When I Came Last to Ludlow>>,曰:

When I came last to Ludlow,
Amidst the moonlight pale,
Two friends kept step beside me,
Two honest lads and hale.

Now Dick lies long in the churchyard,
And Ned lies long in jail,
And I come home to Ludlow
Amidst the moonlight pale.

这诗是没意味可寻的,但总让我想起:

木末芙蓉花,
山中发红萼。
涧户寂无人,
纷纷开且落。

每当回忆和独坐,就不自主的想起这些这样的句子。此盖因触无景之景,而生寡情之情耶?

眼前就是KR,眼后,眼左与右,都是了。这地方是极熟而不需辨别的。穿过草地的小路,随着水泥板之高下而动摇。地上铺的红砖被黑色抹成黯淡的,好像墙上风干的蚊子血的色彩。高高低低的五座砖楼,却冷冷清清的,即不见人走进去,也不见人走出来;偶尔也确有人走进去,偶尔也有人走出来。B座楼下,有一个人在跳绳,一跳一跳的。B座五楼, 有一只黑鸟飞出来。B座楼下,原有一个很小的池塘,不分昼夜的有流水,亦有鱼,不分昼夜地在池塘里转身。现在B座楼下的池塘,基址还在,只是已经被土填埋了矣。埋的土高过塘沿,生满青草(大谢诗曰“池塘生春草”,我有幸见了!),倒像是多年不曾添修的坟头。B座入口处,极高而阔大的水泥台阶,曾经漆着一个神采奕奕的"B"字套在圆圈里。这个标志还在,然非不知古者可知也。盖只留下了斑驳的痕迹,像敦煌石窟中的壁画一般了矣。台阶尽头的空地脏得如同旧日火车站的南广场。唯西厢花圃乱草之中,杂衬了很多白色的花,仿佛瘦小的五星的形象,在乱草之中开放进而枯萎。在这个位置东首,则后面及左右都是B座的门窗,都关闭着。若不是一二窗口透露出灯光,看到风扇在转动,简直像废弃了。而且诚然是被废弃过的,逃过一劫罢了。幸免如Shears的命运,KR和EA,这两个宝贝。

C座的鱼塘也填埋了。塘边的树还在,还是那么高,耷拉着几颗黄叶子,另几片有绿色的向天上伸展着撑开,此真乃生机之体现也。C座一楼的厨房里,灯火通明,灶台冰冷,四壁光洁,地面如镜。风扇静静地载旋载转,微波炉门虚掩着。一只崭新的锅,反射着白光,一只同样崭新的锅,反射着白光。余在白光之中,看到一个青年,头发剃得光光的,正在用开水泡一枚鸡蛋。这时又一位青年,头发光亮而竖起,脸孔白净,从外面走进来,曰:“高君,去排练吧。”光头青年曰:“明天CA,今天我想看看书。”竖发青年曰:“哦…”光头青年曰:“但是,付君,我想,我们的晚会之表演,那是一年一次,而我们能够参加的演出,应该是只有在今年。但CA,一学期多则四次,少则三番。待我吃罢就去。”竖发青年曰:“若去,不如现在。canteen想必还有东西,我们同去,吃完就排练。顺便去叫上张君、杨君诸人。”光头青年曰:“好。那么同去吧。”就走出去,不见了。我想,青年们有志于文艺活动,是很好的。正想与他们交流,竟不知所在,惜哉。那开水泡着的鸡蛋还在,开水已经具有了鸡汤的氤氲香气。一位狐狸幻化的妖精,“大尾曳做长红裳”,断然走进来,把鸡汤端起,道:“今天真运气,老狼请吃鸡…”就很开心,把鸡汤吃掉了矣。

我离开那里,坐在E座树下。那里曾有一个秋千,如A座的一样,也都不在了。抬头看到一户门口挂着“正气轩”三个字。这一座里面,进进出出的人很多,因有洗衣房之故也。通向communal hall的天桥,被截而断之,因为以前的communal hall和餐厅的所在,现在改建为Alumni house之故也。KR,现在是Ridge View Residence之一部分,是全校唯一没有餐厅和自习室的宿舍了。或许YIH是它这些功能的延伸吧。但YIH之伙食,似不如他处为佳,虽远胜PGP,但仍无印度饭这样的知名菜系。可喜者唯素食摊的粥,只是黑米的,我担心吃久了会变黑。虽然据新闻界人士认为,我“黑得看不见”,但余不想更进一步。余发短信给妈妈,问曰:“妈,我天天吃黑米粥,会不会越吃越黑呀?”究竟是知子莫如母,母爱总给人以最大的安慰:“吾儿何所惧哉?你在家吃了一十八年大米白面,白过吗?”余释然,带着轻松的心情,回到YIH的study room,就在踩踏现场的废墟旁,写下了上面的文字。 
 
 
February 15

Incentive toward Pareto

I can't believe today is Feb 14. I mean, shouldn't we have Feb 15 right after Feb 13?
Though ultimate happiness sounds like a Pareto Optimality (note, that Pareto is the guy who developed the conecept which in the end influenced facism in Italy) in fighting with all hardships, twists, and desires in life and finally you realize that you pretty much can't do anything better. But at 2:12pm this afternoon, I do feel a little happy, or--should i put--'groovy'. Finally there's some stimulation and incentive for me to keep moving to Pareto, if there exists one.  It also sends me back to period of time when in the end of the day, standing on the platform of Chua Chu Kang MRT station, waiting for the train back to Buona Vista, I was feeling groovy too.
February 13

值得记忆和值得回忆的

近来生活平淡,虽不至百无聊赖,也算乏善可陈。然而偶有点滴事情,却也不会像掉进时间的黑洞,永远无法找回,而是值得记忆的;或者至少或许现在会暂时忘掉,可也值得在以后一个特定的时间和环境下唤起对当时的记忆,是谓之值得回忆。最近偶尔看电视剧,很旧了,情节也都耳熟能详,可就是其中一小段情节,令我却想起以前自己的一小段事情来。是先有的哪一小段,的确想不起来了。不过重新拾起时,往往都会有新的认知,也许这也就是值得回忆之处吧。
February 09

飆車

3點30,月黑風高,警察回家,我出動了
心情不好的時後
不用上高速公路
也可以飆車,真的很爽
15/501的限速這樣低 只能開55
我好想嘗試開一百二的感覺喔
於是出去South Estes,上15/501往北
結果沒開幾步就接連紅燈,於是掉頭往南
在Erwin和Europa的路口和另一輛車一起等紅燈
剛一轉綠就猛然加速,它一下就被甩在後面
再一看指針已經跳到了65
繼續把油門踩到底,馬上就過了Estes和NC54的紅綠燈
過NC54的天橋時看不到前面的路
心一橫繼續加速,時速直達105
腎上腺素激增,一下子就把什麽都抛在腦后了
看到前面遠遠的有一輛車,和我比起來簡直就是原地不動
(也難怪,人家最多開55,相對它我都有50)
怕出危險,因爲它根本沒時間判斷我在哪一條車道
於是開始減速,沒過幾秒就到了它正後面
可能是因爲被嚇倒,或者以爲我是警車
那個車子竟然減速慢行,於是換道加速再超過
這時已經到Manning Drive了
如果現在是白天 我應該早就被警察抓住了吧
或者派直升機追蹤也説不定
真的好爽

January 29

Walking down Hillsborough St.

 
 
Walking down the dark and bare street,
I wonder, why does the the wind feel like a summer night breeze
Pherhaps, deep inside me, sensations freeze?
Bit by bit, I put my heart and soul into this Martingale1
And in the end, nothing prevail.
 
 
January 28

upcoming movies

#US Release Date, Title, Expectation (out of 5)
#Highlight
#Link
 
Feb 15, "Definitely, Maybe", 4.0
Daughter put together romantic puzzle of three girls from father's failed relationships, just to find which one is her mom. Starred Isla Fisher.Red rose
 
Feb 22, "Charlie Bartlett", 4.5
Released after long production. A rich kid transferred to public school gains acceptance by being psychiatrist in the bathroom.
 
Feb 29, "Penelope", 5.0
Another delayed release. Penelope the girl is cursed to have an elephant trunk on her face. To break the curse, she needs love. Co-starred: Reese Witherspoon!!Red heart
 
March 7, "The Accidental Husband", 4.0
Emma has a fiance. Suddently she found herself married to another guy, by accident.
 
March 28, "21", 5.0
Based on a true story, a group of MIT students trained with math and statistics win millions of dollars by playing blackjack ("21") in Vegas casinos.
 
April 4, "My Blueberry Nights", 4.0
A Wong Kar Wai film. Love it or hate it.
 
April 18, "Forgetting Sarah Marshall", 4.5
Chick flick. Romantic comedy. Underwater diving scene.
 
May 2, "Made of Honor", 4.0
Best friend? or Lover?  Male "maid of honor"? A typical romantic comedy.
 
May 16, "What Happens in Vegas", 3.5
Drunk-married in Vegas, then won million dollars, a young couple now fight each other for money, while still married. Starred Cameron Diaz!!!Red heart
 
June 6, "Kung Fu Panda", 3.5
What?! ok voices by -- Jack Black (Panda), Jackie Chan (Monkey), Dustin Hoffman(Master), Angelina Jolie(Master Tigress(What?!!))
 
July 4, "Hankcock", 4.5
It doesn't have to be good. It's got Will Smith.
 
July 18, "Mama Mia!", 4.5
For all ABBA fans.
 

Poem quote

 
"You've got gold insdie of you
If you look deep enough, you'll see
There'e some gold inside me, too."
 
-- "The Last Time"
July 25

Summer days

Summer Days (Summer Daze)
- courtesy of latest PhD commics
 
Wrote some code, it's still in beta...
Goofed around, don't got no data!
Summer days, toiling away...
In that uh-oh summer daze!
 
Tell me more, tell me more...
Did'ya make any graphs?
Tell me more, tell me more...
Did your prof. have a laugh?
 
*     *      *      *      *      *      *
 
It'll turn cold soon, summer's been hell...
Fall will come, undergrads smell!!!
 
Summer burn... nothing got done...
And now... oh...
 
The summer's goooooone!!!
 

又見頭條日報

頭條日報今日星座
天秤座:(大意)感情上遇到瓶頸,不如先把問題放在一邊好好休息一下。
果然還和以前一樣准! 
July 03

how time..

can change a woman
 
watched "when harry met sally" again
she was there, Meg Ryan
she was in Seattle, she was on top of Empire Building
she was in Paris, and Provence
she was the "Shopgirl" around the corner
she was the sensual and sexy teacher almost in the cut
oh my, oh my, Meg Ryan
how time can change a woman
and woman change a man?